Comfort in Contradiction

I guess sometimes we've just got to agree to disagree. I know it's cliche' but a guess the only reason some things become cliche' is because they're actually true. I was working out today and doing my reading when I happened upon the following words..."The Passion struck me as unhelpful and unhealthy in many ways--providing only a very flimsy context for the life of Jesus, suggesting that violence is somehow good, and that His death matters because it was a really nasty one." This was found in a christian magazine and was written by an academic, freelance writer and research consultant with specialties in religion, film and post-modern culture among other things. Don't get me wrong or tune me out here because here is not where I condemn this text under the guise of being non-christian, against God or unrealistic even though that's what my natural reaction would normally be. I would defend the right of this guy to say these things to the end, I just don't agree with any of it.
After viewing the work for a 3rd time today, my opinion of it remains. It is as it was (to borrow a line from the Pope) the first time that I saw it and it hasn't lessened since. At times I wish that I could watch this every morning before my day begins to remind me of what happened some 2000 years ago and other times I wish that I'd never seen this thing. To me this film is the epitome of the journey. From the actions that birthed the most horrific event in the course of mankind also came the most beautiful. From the most devastating occurrence rises the breathtaking story of eternal redemption. Ultimate triumph is displayed through an unbelievable tragedy. It all depends on your point of view.
To me life seems to be the same way. Filled with contradiction and paradox this thing that we call christianity, or life for that matter, never makes sense from the earthly perspective. I mean, come on, men getting swallowed by whales, worldwide floods, parting of seas, the earth swallowing people, swimming ax heads, etc. etc., and that's not even getting into the New Testament! It doesn't end with the book though. Look at all the terrible things happening in our world today. Look and see how baby's are killed by drunk drivers that walk away, cancer ridden patients who have never touched cigarettes, said 1 curse word, cheated on their spouse or done anything else to deserve this death sentence still die. Gaze further and see how those that cheat, steal and maybe even kill (OJ) get off or even get ahead. It's all about perspective.
You can look at the film and see glorified violence, anti-semitism and perhaps a very flimsy context for the life of Jesus, but I see something more. I see the Bread of Life high and lifted up, broken for you and me. I see the blood that was poured out for many which is of the covenant and of which, must be drunk to abide in Him and be raised on the last day. I'm sure not all would agree, but I find comfort in my discomfort over these things as it helps with other glaring contradiction in my life and with the journey in general. Finding comfort in contradiction and peace in paradox is what I've experienced and I'm confident that that's the providential view...but, I could be wrong.

Passion Songs

The Bosses

Decompartmentalization

Anybody move lately? I know that most of us have had to have move at some point in the past. You know the senario...living out of boxes, can't find anything, etc. etc...what a pain. I've recently experienced this without ever leaving, well, at least not in the physical sense.
I packed up and moved a little over a year ago. It was not on my own accord though. It sorta just happened. It all started with the graduation of last year's high school seniors at our church. With this they were promoted to my class and were now my responsibility. Several of the guys had interest in studying medicine at the time and with my big mouth, I obligated myself to help them in their pursuit of their goals. Working at a local hospital I felt it my duty to try and get these young men jobs in the business to help further these budding careers. One got on at a competing hospital through a connection of mine and the other landed a tech job at the pharmacy that I worked. Then the realization of my idiotic actions dawned on me. Jb, who was then gainfully employed at my place of business had full privy to my 'work life.' His presence was surely going to force me into a place of accountability. A place where I'd never wanted to be before and was not very sure about going now. I had to examine my work life constantly to see if it matched my church one.
Jb was a real gas at work. He not only is there to put an end to my double entendre, innuendo and fun but he also proceeds in telling everyone and I mean EVERYONE that I'm his sunday school teacher. Now the cats really out of the proverbial bag. Now everyone nows that I'm not only supposed to be a man of my word, but also a man of the Word. This is a disaster. This is possibly the worst thing that could have happened to me and very much assuredly the best.
You see, it forced me to move. I moved from the neighborhood of easy religious living into the neighborhood where accountability reigns through relationship. With the move came the unpacking. I had to unpack my pseudo-religious practices of Sunday morn and replace it with authentic relational living that never stops. I had to toss quasi-doctrine of righteous living and replace it with a transparent life that reverberates the Reason. I had to take my life down to the very core which is Christ and rebuild from the Foundation up. He had never left me, it was just that I'd lost Him among all the boxes. I had my Sunday life and then I had my Monday through Friday life, and never did the two cross until then. Oh that I'd gotten Jb on at West Florida! Nothing would have ever changed...my life would have contiued to be a sham.
Through this all I've discovered something pretty amazing. I have passion. I have passion for Him. He forces me to write this now. He forces me to think about black shirts with skulls on them. He forces me to fall deeper in love with Him. He forces me to breakdown everything in my life and examine it and if it doesn't fit, toss it. I never thought breaking down boxes could be such an amazing experience. How bout you? Ready for a move?

Wax-filled Ears

I heard it again today. The still small voice that makes your ears perk up. The one that seemingly comes out of nowhere and gives you pause if you ever are fortunate enough to hear it. For many years my ears were wax-filled and very incapable of hearing it, even though it's been there all along. I'm glad I finally have come to a place in my life where I let Him apply the holy debrox that allows for such discerning listening if I'm just able to shut my pie hole long enough to hear it.
It happened while I was reading the paper this morning. I was reading the article on "The Juice" and how he claimed 200m bronze. His cousin Micah quoted him as saying how he's satisfied to run a good race & not worried about the other competitors and if he wins. Here's where the voice pipes up and says..."don't worry about the others son, I've called you to run and that's all that matters. It doesn't matter what they think about dw or if they ever want to support it's efforts by contributing a blog or whatever. It doesn't matter that they think it too dark, too foreboding or appears satanic...I've called you to run My race and you're already a winner to do so."
I flip a few pages over to where Charlie has written about being judgmental of a whole people group based on the actions of a few. He ends it with some babble about lighting a candle instead of cursing the darkness. Again the murmur arises..."I've called you to shine your light in some dark places my boy. This is what this is all about...it's never been about shining it in the comfortable serenity of an already well lit arena...what's 1 more light amongst 572 already blazing lamps? What purpose does this light have and what does it add to the already existing brightness? I've called you to the back alleys, pits and other hidden places in My creation that may never receive My light unless you bring it. So, quit your whining already and just bring it...bring Me.
I sojourn a bit further and again it happens. Ma$e is asked about how his new music fits with his religious message. He replies, "People have it misconstrued. I mean, I'm not religious. That's the biggest folly right there. I'm not religious. I hate religion. Religion kills people. What I have is a personal relationship with God." Still more murmur..." did you catch it? Where you listening? I had him say it twice just for good measure. I haven't called you for religious reasons as so many would cop out by saying...I've called you for relationship and for all the reasons that that brings. I see your relationships and how pitiful they are...with your family, your friends, your co-workers and most of all with Me. I've called you to refine all of these by refining the only 1 that really matters. That's what matters to Me. That's your purpose, the purpose of dw and moreover the purpose of all my children..."
Then it was gone. I've tried to express these words as intently as they were spoken to me, but I fear that I may have failed to do so. Please don't hold my shortcomings against Him. He doesn't deserve disdain for the failure of His servant, but too often it happens that way. Try to see beyond my failings into the One that pushes me to try once again. How's your hearing? There's plenty of debrox to go around...

Dunkin' Oreos

Don't know if you're a subscriber ot Relevant magazine or not, or even know what I'm talking about, but in the current issue I was struck by an interesting article by John Fischer. John's a favorite of mine and is described as an artist, thinker and communicator driven to create and personally deliver a message of deeper understanding of God, confirming those seeking a faith that intersects the real world. In the article John attacks the ideal of legalistic christianity with an interesting metaphor. He purposely creates a random cultural taboo so it might be easier to study the traps we fall into without getting sidetracked by the emotional baggage carried by things like dancing, drinking, smoking, R-rated movies, partying and the like that have been problems for evangelicals for decades. For purposes of argument, John explores the ramifications of indulging in the tragic sin of eating Oreo cookies.
John speaks of Jim who is part of a christian group with a long-standing tradition of believing that eating Oreo cookies is spiritually wrong. Oreos are bad for you, even sinful, and something that christians should avoid. You will be more righteous if you don't eat Oreo cookies than if you do. In fact, if you do indulge in the chocolate treat, there are grounds for questioning your salvation.
Now this does a number of things for Jim. It makes it very clear what separates him, as a christian, from non-christians. It makes him feel morally superior to non-christian Oreo junkies. In fact, he is finding it more and more difficult being around non-christians since is seems they only want to talk about the next batch of cookies they have in their drawer or what happened last night when they wolfed down two family packs with some friends.
In this, Jim has a ready-made testimony. He shares with the christian group that he was offered some Oreos at work, and he turned them down. "No thanks, I'm a christian. I don't do Oreos." And as he shares this with the group, he is affirmed for being a great witness and for standing up for what he believes. Jim has just sailed to new spiritual heights with this proclamation and refusal to bend. He has now "paid" for his faith. He's earned his marks as a christian who is different. Non-christians now think he's weird, and that only makes him stronger for being persecuted. He can even be compared to the great martyrs of the faith.
Contrary to Jim are a couple renegade members of the christian group who actually don't think there is anything wrong with eating Oreo cookies as long as you eat in moderation, since the Bible doesn't mention anything about cookies anyway. And when word gets out that they do on occasion imbibe, these two are called into question by the group. "How can you call yourself christians and eat Oreos? What's the point of being a Christian if you're not going to be different from the world? You're losing your testimony. Where are you going to draw the line? Pretty soon you'll be pulling them apart and licking off the white stuff, and from there it's just a short trip to Oreo ice cream sandwiches, and we all where that ends up." Of course, these people are thought of as a bad influence on the rest of the group, and their future in the group will be bleak unless they change their ways.
In all of this, the person who isn't a christian is left clueless. The little "No thanks, I'm a christian, I don't do Oreos" speech is wasted on them because they have no understanding of what is wrong with Oreo cookies in the first place, and they are oblivious to the spiritual connections that christians make about these things. All they can think of is that these people who call themselves christians are weird. They are a different breed of animal, and they seem to like it that way. People outside the evangelical tradition just don't get it, because no one explained the rules of the game to them, and even if they did, they wouldn't get it. The rules don't apply to them anyway. They are christian rules, which have become a way of setting ourselves apart in our own minds only. And in the end, avoiding Oreos don't make the christian any better. It just makes him different.
It might mean something if this difference was in terms of character, integrity, compassion, mercy, patience, kindness or respect for others, but when it is only in terms of a few cultural taboos, it is useless to God and a waste of Christ's blood to those who are lost.
Anybody got milk? These Oreos are really dry without it...Oreos rule!

Righteous Babes

Being a babe in the faith brings about mostly negative connotations when thought of within the usual context that is our tradition. I propose a new view. Aly (pronounced Ow-eee) is our youngest and has been a true blessing to our lives. She's just learned to crawl and is exploring her expanding horizons with increasing fervor and excitement. With eyes wide she ambles across the floor in search of whatever the next turn brings her. Today she discovered the fun of flailing away at the shower curtail while I tried to wash away the days dirt and grime that work brings. After I noticed my little explorer outside the curtain I thought that I'd enjoy the moment a bit. Standing on top of a ledge within the shower I was able to peer down over the curtain to where little Aly played. I began to drip drops of water down on her and nearly lost it as she squealed with excitement of this individual rainstorm. She swung her arms like a windmill in a hurricane at the dropping drips as she closed her eyes and held her mouth agape. She was having a ball. I so wanted to holler at Amy to watch the show, but didn't at risk of letting the cat out of the bag. She continued to play and just enjoy the moment as this went on for several minutes. Finally I decided to put an end to the fun due to the floor's increasing wetness and for fear that little Aly might slip and hurt her self.
As quickly as our little play session began, it was over. I finished my shower and Aly moved on to discover new treasures found in the closet when it hit me. Maybe our interaction with the Father occurs in much the same way. Maybe as babes we crawl and explore the unsearchable depths when we happen upon a place where He begins to drop drips down into our being. The thing to me is, how do we respond? Do we flail and play, closing our eyes, opening our mouth and allow for little unintelligible utterances to flow in the majesty that is our Lord, or do we rush to move on to the next thing in a hurried state to be busy for His sake? Do we know how to savor the moment, or more importantly the Savior? Do we allow ourselves to be totally immersed in the mystery of His very nature without worrying about what others would think, or our having to qualify the very purpose of our discovery?
Sure, I know that one day what we see in part will be totally revealed to us and what a marvelous day that will be, but until then, can we just marvel and enjoy the spectacle of wonder? Can we learn to embrace the unknown of Him as well as the miniscule known? His ways are definitely higher than ours and certainly for a purpose that is sometimes hard for us to understand.
Lord, help me to be your holy infant, with eyes wide, crawling through a faith of discovery and enormity that I could never comprehend, but embrace freely in spite of my ignorance. Grant me peace in where I'm at and acceptance of the dripping drops from above.

My Son the Teacher

I know that we've all heard about having childlike faith, but I've noticed a few attributes to all the innocence that those words immediately bring to mind. Being a father of 3, all under the age of 5, I've got my hands full to say the least. Cam, my oldest, is usually the most demanding of my time and I wouldn't have it any other way. Just observing him from time to time can be an amazing experience as well as one that will try your patience to the nth. A couple days ago the thought of Christ longing to lay hands on some children and bless them was fresh in my mind as Cam and I were going through our regular routine that is my week off. The mornings usually consist of me trying to get a few things done that I've neglected in my past week of an 80 hour work schedule, while Cam's goal is to get the undivided attention of his father. He wants my eyes on him 100% of the time, if I'm not directly interacting with him, and he has become quite creative in the ways he attempts to make this happen. He can be smothering at times and can bombard you with a million questions and requests to spend time with him. For some strange reason he loves his father with everything that he has and just wants to be with him. The really good part of this is that his father really loves him too with everything that he has and ends up spending a great deal of time just being with him. I mean, that's it right? To have a childlike faith (which is a verb right?) we should long to engage the Father at all times and in all ways and for our desiring of His almighty gaze to be fixed on us in all that we do. Cam's taught me how special our relationship is, but even more, he's taught me how vitally important my relationship with my Father is.
One other thing about Cam is that he's a snuggler. I mean the little guy truly desires to snuggle on the couch, bed, floor, etc. etc. You name the place and when the time is right (usually when he's tired and ready to nap) Cam is ready to curl up right next to you. He's got such a desire for this that it's hard to keep him in his bed at night. It never fails, when you think that you've got him safely tucked away and you can rest in the comfort of your own king sized bed, you can rely on hearing the pitter patter of little Cam feet across the living room floor headed your way for a midnight snuggle session. He'll even tell you that he likes to snuggle. I love that about him so much, that I can never find the strength to make him return to his own bed.
Christ asks us to come to Him and He will give us rest. I've also learned from Cam of my own need to be a spiritual snuggler with the One who longs to give me rest. I should truly desire to not only have His eye upon me and everything that I do, engaging Him throughout my walk and building a vibrant, dynamic relationship, but I also need to come to Him when I let this old world break me down and wear me out. Instead of lashing out in my fatigue, I need to learn to snuggle with my Saviour.
Lord, help me to be more childlike and pleasing to You.

Living It

Another Saturday nite and another time to cram some stuff together for another Sunday morning time of Spirit led Bible study. Please re-read the last sentence again to see if it makes any sense to you, because it sounds pretty oxymoronic to me. Oxymoronic you may ask...isn't it you who wrote the blasted thing to begin with? Well, yeah, but let me explain myself here. We've been talking somewhat over the last several months about a couple of big ideas. Primarily prayer and worship have dominated the discussions of late and to go even further we've discussed what it means to have a life of prayer or worship as opposed to having a prayer life or worship life. Confused yet? Please allow me to elaborate a bit further if you will. We've tried to define what it means to live lives that are totally consumed with either act (prayer/worship) instead of living lives that have either (prayer/worship) as merely one small aspect of it. Clear as mud yet? Good.
Maybe this explains the fact that instead of studying a lesson for tomorrow morn I'm hitting the hay. That's right kiddo's no prepared lesson for tomorrow!!! Yeah!!! I guess by now you're really confused and that may be only because I'm not doing this (studying my lesson) in the traditional sense. You see, in much the same way that I've tried to have a life of prayer instead of a prayer life and a life of worship instead of a worshipful part of my life, I've prepared for tomorrow's lesson the hard way this week...by living it. From the special visitors that appeared on my doorstep on Wednesday afternoon in the forms of Elders Wang & Jacobs and the confirmation of that special experience in the Spencer Burke book the next day to the studying of the Corban vow as found in Matthew 15 and it's relation to a fundraiser at the following leadership meeting that evening, I've been prepped by the Holy Spirit, confirmed by the word and seen signs of an amazing sort. If you'd like, I'd be happy to fill you in on the details sometime, but for now, suffice it to say, I've walk with the One and He's given me all that I need to be prepared for relating His word.
Thanks Father for an unbelievable week, which only You could provide...

I Had A Rock

There was a murmur in the wind
The crowds begin to form
You could feel the electricity in the air
She'll get her's...this is what's lawful and what she deserves
I feel the course, abrasive tool
I don't even remember stooping to pick it up, but it's there
It's there and awaiting my instruction
It's nothing spectacular and not capable of anything on it's own

Others grow restless in anticipation of the festival
Who'll get the first shot in? the last?
Sometimes the first is always the hardest and most electric
It seems to break an invisible surface tension that protects the wretched
Afterwards the others seem to float in effortlessly
They find their mark most maliciously and without any apologies
After all, this is His work and something that we must do...right?
The thirst for sheer violence and spectacle of it all helps in the justification
The first time was hard, but they have sense grown easier

Ah, now we'll get to it
I see one in front who stoops
Maybe he'll be the first and it'll begin...
What's this? He's not got a rock at all, he's just writing in the sand
He's saying something, but I'm too far to hear
He crouches again and returns to his writing
What??? Everyone is turning as to leave?
This can't be right! We've got His work to be about...don't we?

I reflect often on that day and the ones since
On the instrument that I caressed in my hands posed for violence in His name
On the anticipation that fed my flesh and raced my heart
This day is not so unlike the one previous
I once again carry my course, abrasive tool close to my chest
This time though my thoughts are clear and not deceived by an excited heart
This time is for real and I know that I know that He'll be pleased

I once again drop the stone, not unlike the first
I once again turn from the stone, but leave it unattended for just a while
I retrieve another and place it beside the first
This goes on for sometime until the wall begins to take shape
Pretty soon this place will be suitable for meeting in again

It has taken quite some time for me to realize the difference between the stones
The first was to fulfill my will and indulge my flesh under the heading of His own
The second and subsequent ones were for Him and Him alone and I knew this now
I mean, I knew that I knew for the first time and it was if I was reborn at that point
I finally realized that I've had these stones in my life all along
They've always been unspectacular and incapable of anything on their own
I also realized that my first assessment was correct...these were just tools
It has always been up to me as to how they've been used
To be hurled in anger and self-serving conceit or dropped at the feet as to build up

It's always been up to me

Spiritual Olympics

Oh the beauty, wonder, and specter that is the Olympics Games. Personally I could care less about the games this year, or really any year for that matter, but even less for these particular games. Why do you ask? It has a whole lot to do with the fact that we aren't even qualified in the sport that titters on the brink of Olympic death with every passing year due to it's international unpopularity. The sport that is a metaphor for life, that is the greatest of them all and is supposed to be our national pastime. The sport that requires the greatest amount of skill of all...to hit squarely a round ball with a round bat...and where success/greatness is measured by numbers that equate to 30-40%. Just imagine, if you could, a situation where you are considered legend when you fail 60-70% of the time. Now, that's what I call a tough gig.
With my apparent bias towards the game that is baseball, you might think that I think less of all other sports or the required skills to master them. That my appreciation for the other games is not fully garnered due to my blind eye towards the one that holds my interest and admiration. I'd like to think that you're wrong, but odds are you're right to a certain degree. I'll never fully comprehend the skill, talent and precision that is the 3m synchronized spring board, but I can still appreciate, to my own limited degree, dedication it takes to compete in said event and support the participants of my choosing, whether they be from the U. S., Slovakia or wherever. My lack of comprehension doesn't even hinder my words of encouragement to the athletes or my well-wishing on their behalf's.
In too many ways I think that the christian experience has it's own type of ministerial olympics. You see, it has been my experience that not everybody catches the vision of the participants and gets on board at times due to this lack of interest. I'm not interested in the 3m synchronized spring board for Christ so I'm opting out of this event and am content to wait for something else more appealing to me or whatever. I know nothing of the 200m butterfly so I won't even bother to encourage those involved or even acknowledge their efforts. I don't appreciate the talents or efforts of beach volleyball, so I'll just make believe that I'm busy with something else.
For far too long I've been convicted on all counts of inactivity, due to the above or even more ridiculous reasons. We all may not be able to dive, swim or whatever, but we all can acknowledge, encourage, appreciate and intercede. I hope that the body as a whole can forgive my absence and let me back into the arena.
Then again...when was that medal round for synchronized swimming?
Lord, please forgive my absence and silence as others have struggled to fulfill Your vision in their lives...

Open Invitation

So here's the deal. I'm challenging all oncomers to journey with me. To concentrate on the travel instead of the destination. To focus on the process instead of the appearance of success or failure. To tug at the curtain that hides their frailty and faults for the benefit of another. That's what this has been about all along. It hasn't been about ego. It hasn't been about self. It hasn't been about righting wrongs or setting people straight. It's been about discovery. It's been about self-examination. Ultimately I pray that it has been or will be about facilitation. We've got plenty of knowledge in our midst and we've also got plenty of talented teachers, preachers and overseers. Maybe the one thing that we lack and most desperately need are facilitators. Folks that don't profess superior knowledge or talents, even though it'd be quite evident that they do, but those that are sick of false appearances and isolation and are willing to go skin to skin with the Almighty and His creation. Folks that are willing to shine the light down deep into their own dark places to possibly edify another and receive grace and intercession in the process. People that are tired of the same mindless babble that consumes our days and nights and long for real authenticity. We desperately need less heroes and more humans. At the risk of seeming spiritual immaturity, we need more to come forward and share their brokenness, something in which we can all relate and identify.
So who's with me? Who wants to join this band of brokendown people desperate for Relationship? Who wants to share their hurts, wants and desires with a group of fellow travelers who all know that His grace is not only sufficient in the saving act, but also in the walk afterwards? I'm desperate. Are you? Just e-mail me through the website and we'll get you settled in. We (I) long for community and here's where we can start. Face to face has proven a more daunting task for most, so I propose that here's the place. We can meet here anytime, day or night, and share, care, love, hate, lift, bringdown, buildup, breakdown or just about anything that it takes to help us along the way. The choice is your's...
Father, have your way with this place...

Saturday Nite Special

Oh the dreaded Saturday night routine of the Sunday School teacher...some finally making time to study some semblance of a lesson, others studying it for the 7th time or still others possibly putting it off till morning. For me it's the time that I put a cap on the week's thoughts by dropping ink blots on clean paper. I've tried to just summarize on Sunday what me & Dad have talked, or more often than not, fought (i.e. wrestled) about the previous 7 days. One of the challenges unique to myself is that everything that we cover doesn't come from a particular set of literature. We've long since thrown that out along with all the false pretenses and making of nice-nice christiansese that edifies no one and patronizes at best.
This particular session of hashing out what to say tomorrow morn hasn't gone according to plan to say the least. I sat ready to pound out a lesson on our on-going talk of worship today when He said no. You just gotta hate that. What then? I've gotta have something for my peeps. Something new, hip and hopefully engaging especially on a spiritual level. Then it happened. I picked up the book that's been collecting dust on the corner of my desk for the past few weeks. I've longed to read it, but just had a few others to finish before I could dive in. Well, today's the day...it's written by a guy named Spencer Burke, whom I've taken particular interest in lately. His story is an interesting one and one worth looking into. His book is Making Sense of Church and is a collection of rants/raves/commentaries from the website of his creating called theooze.com. If you haven't been there I'd recommend it. It's tagline is "conversations for the journey" and would be worth your time to drop by.
The weird thing about this all is that it appears that Spencer has been hiding out in the back part of my mind eavesdropping on all my synaptic activity of late and apparently it's time that we talk about these things Sunday mornings for the next few weeks.
We're going to be addressing somethings that we've been doing already for sometime now, just in a different context and maybe introducing some new verbiage. It is apparently time to walk the path of post-modernism and explore what that means to the church corporate and maybe more importantly to us a real-life christians...
Father, please help us to walk on...

The More Carrots I See

It just ain't gonna happen I guess. Everytime I think that this is the end, that dw is finally dead and buried, that it was just a very presumptuous proposition to begin with and beyond that a very stupid idea, I get to seeing more carrots. More carrots you ask? Yeah...just like the tired old ass that wants to park it and take a break from his ground-breaking duties, he is motivated to push on a little further to really see if he could ever reach that dangling carrot that sways ahead on a string out of the sky. This has really been a mind-blowing experience. Who would have thought that a dumb old redneck from northwest Louisiana would wind up in Pace, Fl of all places? Who would have thought that the same dumb old redneck who hated to read and especially write would find himself pounding away on a keyboard as often as he does? Who would have thought that the same dumb old redneck would be able to be apart of sharing Christ with over a thousand folks world wide as of last count? Who would have thought that the same dumb old redneck (D.O.R.) would have an article ran as the feature online exclusive at Relevantmagazine.com? Who would have thought that the same D.O.R. would find himself in Gulfport, Ms. interviewing a couple of his sons hero's in the music business for an online exclusive? All this may not sound like a whole lot to you, but when you consider that a comment on one of my first papers in college included the words "needs to learn to write like a human being", it may. Or you may be of the mind that I still need to learn to write like a human being, I dunno. Regardless of what has happened or what lays ahead in the future I know one thing, that this is right. Regardless of if these words go unread, or read and belittled or whatever I know that He's pleased. Everytime that I want to quit, He's always there dangling that stupid carrot. What kind of ass am I to quit?
Thanks Father...

God's X-Men

Cam and I love to spend time reading comics together. It's what we do. The next to last issue of Ultimate X-men left me thinking of more than just about the return of Gambit or the eventual death of Sinister. It left me wondering about how as believers that we're supposed to be the future and that more importantly, we're called to be totally different than our surroundings which will serve as our example of what all a life can be that is lived in the way. The X-Men have to deal with a sinister foe in the form of Sinister and through this experience have a choice. Rogue and Storm have the ability to either conform to the world and their desires for retribution in the very warranted execution of Sinister or they can and do do something totally different and unique. Storm argues with Rogue over the life of one so devious... "if we're supposed to be what's next...let's try something new". Against what they really wanted to do in their flesh born desires they turn Sinister into the authorities. With all this being said (or read as the case may be), aren't we as christians supposed to be what's next? Aren't we the ultimate in real-life spiritual mutation as the One steps in and evolves us into new beings? How much longer do we intend to act as spiritual cretins instead of His divinely called X-Men? How much longer do we intend to show this world anything but His love, acceptance and forgiveness through our actions that serve self, flesh and mirror the fallen creation in which we now live?
Lord, please help me to stand strong for You through sacrifice and service to my fellow men. Help me to be what you've called & created anew instead of wallowing in the filth of fleshly desires...help me to be your X-Man.

The Law

In preparing for tonight's lesson, I had been thinking a lot recently about this whole idea of the fulfilling of the law of Christ by carrying each other's burdens. My thinking up until this point was that with the life, death, burial and resurrection of Christ, that the law was a thing of the past and was/is only useful in pointing out our need for Him by illuminating our sinful state. We all know that He came to fulfill the law, not to abolish it and that we now live under grace, but what if through His work of fulfillment and redemption we are now held to requirements that are much more difficult to satisfy than the over 600 different codes of the Mishnah? I may be splitting hairs, but it seems that the ceremonial/civil laws that ruled the ancient day may have been at least a little less dangerous than the laws on which they all hang and the law of heavy burden lifting (of others) that Christ left us with. Although more numerous, the ancient ways built a formula in God pleasing that left us cold and indifferent to others and possibly even to Him, while what we have today is seemly more difficult and definitely more dangerous. I mean, what could be more dangerous to commit to loving a god who is wild and compassionate in His relationship with His children and is uncontrollable? What could leave us more defenseless, than opening up to our brothers/sisters for their support and for us their's? What could be more time consuming and inconvenient than investing ourselves in each other for the building up of the body? To me, it's almost as if Christ fulfilled the law and left a grace which almost seems harder to deal with than the later. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely glad that He did, it's just that maybe we sometimes breathe a sigh of relief with the dismissal of the law and totally forget the still daunting task that lay ahead. If we are dealt with in grace and a compassionate love that passeth all understanding, how much more are we to do the same to our brothers, sisters and neighbors? Pretty tough stuff.

Ground Rules

There's still some more ground work to be covered before this whole thing can proceed. One thing that still concerns me about this all is the idea of being completely honest at the risk of offending some and damaging relationships instead of fostering them. Motive and intent is definitely one thing that doesn't translate from the flow of electrons that make up the words on this screen to the minds of those devouring these said words. That actually concerns me a great deal. You see, I've already had some experience with the attempt to exchange ideas in the market place of independent thought and have had the best of intentions when this bartering was to be done, but quick to my dismay, I've found that the same words that were birthed from a truly honest place in my heart were met with hurt feelings and terse faces. My one desire is to build up, not to tear down. I long to become as transparent as possible so that we could possible help one another, not take bites out of each other at the risk of devouring ourselves. Making the internal monologue public domain is going to be a very risky proposition for myself or for anyone else either daring or dumb enough to try, but I long for the place where folks could peer inside of these words and realize the motive is true. I'll promise to anyone who cares that these words are NOT meant to belittle, right a wrong, put someone in place, settle a score, get back at, or anything else...they're simply a outflowing of a process that occurs within myself. I keep thinking of one of things that Tom told me over the past weekend when I asked him if he or the guys (Falling Up) were ever offended by this or that. His response was that as Christians we're called to overlook offenses...hmm. What an amazingly easy thing to say, but a most difficult thing to do. I'm not there yet, but this is definitely something that I'm working on. Anyone with me?

Megalomaniac

I'm not really sold on this whole idea, but I've never let that stop me before. I mean, I'm not sure what kind of megalomaniac it takes to think that anyone would be interested enough to read what they have to say about anything at anytime, much less to read a journal of their internal thinkings, but it just might be the way. It just might be the way to help us in the Way. For whatever reason, we rarely find the time to invest ourselves in others to the degree that we should. We make all the right small talk, but rarely do we expect to gain any true information from these quick exchanges. We never long to fulfill the law by bearing one another's burdens. I'm just as guilty as the next when it comes to this and I hate myself for it. I want change, within our body and especially within myself. Is this the way? I don't know, but I'm desperate to search out anything that might lead us to that all too needed change. I long for more in my walk and in my life. Who doesn't? Maybe I'm just foolish enough to think that this could work, or maybe I'm just dumb enough to at least try.