unrealistically problematic

i've found a new obsession...

it's smallville & i know that i'm a late comer, but i've been totally consumed w/this show. it just so happened to garner my attention when my life seemed to parallel the same emotional pulls that the characters on screen where experiencing. they're beautifully flawed, yet continue to struggle & succeed in making it through the programmed hour in spite of their apparent weaknesses.

they also have to contend w/very supernatural acts that are bigger than themselves, yet endure w/a hope of tomorrow that is unyielding in light of the very checkered past. there's great potential for marvelous deeds to be done as well as very remarkable evil. i love the idea of enormous potentiality birthed thru very broken vessels that often force intense self-evaluation & soul searching.

to put it quite simply...

i'm an addict...

seeing relational conflict resolved in constructive as well as deconstructive ways are very therapeutic & realistic to me now. i long to embrace the pleasure as well as the pain that always comes w/growth & maturation. the avoidance of such only proves unrealistically problematic for anyone that longs to grow to embrace the very real life that we're called to live.

this show allegorically depicts my life in the present...

a very broken & incomplete man longing to reflect the glory of the supernatural w/nothing but shards of a once majestic mirror in his very bloody hands...

hoping beyond all hope that the images reflected would capture the gaze of the casual observer rather than the babbling fool trying to hold all the pieces together...

unrealistically problematic @ best w/out the intervention of something much grandeur & loftier than all i could ever hope to be...

all the while singing...

somebody save me

i don't care how you do it

just stay

stay

come on

i've been waiting for you