H.O.P.

I don't know about you, but I've just got to believe that God pulls the clouds back, leans in & gets a big laugh @ my expense from time to time. He does so only to keep from crying when I have to be confronted w/His truth time & time again. The whole process seems akin to teaching long division to a pre-schooler, yet He continues to allow me to plod along.


Now that's what I call long suffering.


He speaks in ways that are often times more apparent than the audible voice & transcend time & space. Complete darkness flees my way during these times as He chooses to apply the dirt laden spittle to my eyes. I tend to squint a lot @ 1st, but am always thankful for the process, however humbling it is.


After today, I'm left wiping my eyes while I type, ever thankful once again that He continues to lead. The mode this day was in the form of a conversation w/my 2nd oldest. My very words to her may have been the 1st heard by my own ears, but that were 1st spoken into my heart sometime before. I only came to realize this today.


Daddy, I want to go for a bike ride after school.

O-kay baby, that'll be fun.

After the passage of some uncertain amount of time...

Daddy, I want to go for a bike ride after school.

I know that baby, you've already told me that once & unlike you & your brother, Daddy doesn't have to be told more than once.

Yet another passage of some uncertain amount of time, but not quite the appointed time to hit the bike...

Daddy, I want to go for a bike ride.


No P! Now go to your room! We were going to go for a ride, but your continual asking especially after I've told you that we would has proven that you're not listening to me & deserving to go...


It's @ this point that I thank God that I'm not Him or that He's not me or whatever...


But this only begs to ask the question how I've pushed Him to what would look like a very human response in reaction to a very childish & not to mention annoying petitioning. How many times has He shaken His mighty head going


Lee, Lee, Lee...get outa my face w/your constant whining & asking of the same mundanely elemental things that I've already said that I'd do? Got to your room...

Well, I've been to my room & I still scratch my head knowing that I've be shown the Hand of Providence today through the conversation w/my child. I've been taught from the Master & as much as I cherish the lesson, I relish the thought that I know it'll be lost on me in the near future. As always I'll learn from this particular peak in the ride only to forget it's truth in the valley laying in wait behind the next turn.

This leaves me to say in the same breathe...


Thanks...I'm sorry...